WARNING: This post makes reference to pubic hair.
But not yet.
My eyes have been bugging me. I've always been proud of my vision... I've always been able to see things that other people couldn't, and from some pretty great distances, too. But over the last six months, I've had a harder time focusing on things both near and far. So today, I got my eyes examined. Glasses! I'm getting glasses! Apparently, I've got a mild astigmatism.
Now, I have to be honest: I was sort of HOPING to need glasses. But only for reading/computer stuff. I mean, I think glasses are so cool. But now it turns out I'm getting glasses to wear ALL THE TIME. Be care what you wish for, indeed.
Add to this my slowly thinning hair (Admittedly, this is relative.. I just used to have LOTS of hair. HUGE hair. Long, curly, crazy-ass hair. Now I have regular hair. Short. Boringly normal.), my suddenly shot-through-with-gray beard, and my first GRAY pubic hair... and I'm feeling a little like walking, talking ONSET. Did I mention the hearing damage from my drumming-in-dirtbag-bars days? What? Could you speak up?
But then again: I'm running another half-marathon this weekend. I've lost 15 pounds (I'm now 5 pounds from the weight I was when I got married 10 years ago), and I've been going to the gym in earnest... Add to that that I quit smoking in 2000, and quit drinking in 2003... and I'm probably in the best shape of my life.
Ah, fuck it. I've spawned three times over. I'm rightfully being replaced by the younger, superior, next generation.
Love to all. Even you, the kid who plays too much CounterStrike.
2 comments:
Whoa.
With all respects, I totally disagree with you. I think kids actually ADD energy... in fact, they broaden the bookends of emotional experience (the highs and the lows) SO much that I feel like I'd be missing out hugely if I didn't have kids.
Yay, spawn!
Hm.
I'll think that one over.
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