A short time ago, I posted an admittedly-egotistical but somewhat deservedly-excited body shot of myself which appeared as if I was actually getting in shape. Never having been in shape before, I'm pretty psyched on the whole situation.
I didn't expect many comments from women. But there was one person who I was hoping would comment, for better or worse, Albert, aka ARG, from Obliquity.
Why? Because, in the end, it's the gay man's opinion that'll really tell you how you look... and ARG is the only blogger on my blogroll who I know is gay. And if there's any reason for straight guys to get over any homophobia they might have, knowing whether or not you actually look good should be reason enough.
When I was younger and working in NYC (I still work in NYC, I'm just older) I would get checked out by dudes with some regularity. Then, over time, nothing. It just stopped. It could have been my vibe, that I was getting older... or maybe it was because I was green and bloated from drinking 10 - 16 drinks a day. That could have been it, too.
The thing is, women can't give semi- or unknown-men feedback. Because most dudes would incorrectly translate a "looking over" by a woman as her saying "Please have sex with me immediately." Regardless of whether a gay man is saying that or not, there's more of a perceived power balance between men, and the checking-out can generally happen without fear of one dude
stalking the other, etc.
Yesterday, I was walking from my morning AA meeting with some friends, one of whom is a successful interior designer (he was in Elle Decor a little while back), and this very topic came up.
He agreed with me: if gay men don't think you look hot, then you don't look hot. Alas.
So, I'd just like to thank God for making me appreciate the appraisals and dismissals of gay men. Homophobes just aren't getting appropriate feedback, which is a shame.
Love to all. Even you, Ms. Knock-Over-The-Apples-And-Run-From-The-Aisle.
7 comments:
Maybe you aren't one of the "most dudes", so I don't need to say this but I did not mean "Please have sex with me immediately." when I commented on your bod.
What I meant was "You look good" but as I'm not male, nor am I gay, you won't be accepting my opinion.
:-)
That's not what I meant, I swear!
I meant that since most women don't feel comfortable checking guys out (because many guys would react inappropriately) a really good source of feedback is gay men.
Of course I accept your opinion... good OR bad!
:-)
You can add another gay man to your reader list. I am here by way of the great OBLIQUITY too...
A breath of fresh air. Most of my reads are from many different walks of life. You've got a great blog. I will return. You can find me at:
http://thetaoofjeremy.blogspot.com
You might find commonality at the Tao too. We have alot in common.
Cheers
Jeremy
Montreal
OK, I need to find this post now. ;)
oh Rich, you look sooo fine :P
Kidding!
Albert sent us all over to tell you how hot you looked in your pic. Being an ogling - obliging! I mean obliging honestly - sort of guy, I complied. The workouts are, ahem, working.
Is it getting warm in here?
You need to go check out Steve at The Hygiene Chronicles he admires the male form.
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